Good-tastic

Darby and I saw Fantastic Four yesterday. While just about every reviewer in the country gave this movie a thumbs-mostly-down, as a comic-fan, and a movie enthusiast, I felt it was something I had to see for myself, even if it was difficult to swallow. Putting aside for one moment the very important, mythic lineage of the whole of Fantastic Four history-in-print, I walked away reasonably entertained (more on this in a moment). While I can see where the F4 fans will have issue with the film, I tried very hard not to let any of that get in the way for me.

As for film particulars, here are a few points (skip for non-spoilage):
They wasted no time having their accidental power-grab. That's probably a good thing because the film was already nearly two hours without the up-front, drawn-out character development (even doing it Spider-man style would have pushed it).

Much time was spent analyzing their DNA alteration after the accident, which was pretty neat. Though the whole stone-yet-still-functional-internal-organs point was odd because the Thing's eyes and mouth seemed quite non-stone. Plus, he was eating a drinking, so then I'm wondering what happens when he sits on the toilet (aside from it breaking). I mean, does the term "sh!tting bricks" apply here? Sorry, I've digressed, I know, but it's not THAT off topic.

Anyway, the two scenes where Ben "Thing" Grimm's wife reacts to his altered-state were definitely the most overdone parts of the movie for me. It just seemed out of character. I mean, they make a pretty big play on Ben's ability to read people, yet he doesn't see that his own wife is external-appearance motivated and internally shallow? I'm not sure I buy that.

The comedy bits worked pretty well. I thought they'd take away from the movie, but I really didn't find myself being too distracted by them. I didn't say they weren't hokey, but I expected that, since many of the gags were in the trailer.

The film nearly stalled towards the end of the "major full-team fight scene with fully realized bad-guy", but by then, you know it's winding down, and are a little tolerant of a slight tail-spin.

I did also have an issue with Ben Grimm going back into the "cosmic storm simulator" to become the Thing again. Not because he wouldn't have done so character-wise (because he definitely would), but because I would expect the results of a DNA-altering cosmic storm to be somewhat random. I'm thinking the next time he went in, he'd come out some other kind of super-something, not another pile-o-rocks, unless his genetic pre-disposition was "rocky" or something.

There were obvious problems with the Dr. Doom character. But I'm not even going to touch those. I wasn't expecting a deep, meaningful villian, so this was no shocker. In the context of the movie, I don't think the F4 uneducated will notice.


In near-summation, if the goal of a movie is to make us feel entertained and as though that six or eight or ten bucks we paid to get in the door (plus the twenty for "re-freshments"... you'd think we'd get "freshments" for that much cash) was worthwhile, then this movie did the job for me (and Darby agrees). I spent twelve bucks to get Darby and myself in the door that afternoon, another six for recycled freshness, and for that entry fee at least, I feel okay about my EROI (entertainment return on investment). However, if the goal of a movie instead is simply to summarize precisely a pre-defined series of scripts written over the course of forty-four years, by many different people, but still yet placed into a concise two-hour package, then this movie has failed. As have all other adaptations of works not originally conceived for the screen. Even the very best ones. Spider-Man, X-Men, Hellboy, Batman... we're forgiving in those cases. Personally, I've chosen to be forgiving here as well.

So, the die-hard F4 fan-folk will (probably) hate this movie. Either because they are simply destined to hate it, because they just really don't like it, or because they plain hate anything that isn't created in the image of their own imagination. The key thing, I think, to keep in mind here, is that this movie was not made by unfamiliar third-parties. It's not an "unauthorized biography" type of flick filled with speculation and hearsay. Marvel Entertainment made this movie. It's official. Who are we to say they're wrong about the story (even if we have it in black and white that they are)? It's a movie from the horses mouth, so live with it and integrate it into what you know to be the "continuity" of the Marvel Universe. It'll be more fun that way. For all of us.

But if all else fails, just remember that there's always Jessica Alba. She (and the rest of her) get enough screen time to make you almost forget that all those professional reviewer-types said you'd hate the movie. So then when people ask you how it was you can say, "looked good to me." And you'd be quite truthful. Ironically, she's the one thing you most want to not be invisible in the movie, yet it's her very purpose to lack visibility.

The final assessment? Maybe not fantastic, definitely not terrible, but probably good enough.


Side note: This site, which boldly rates the 100 Greatest Comics of the 20th Century, has a nice Fantastic Four #1 write-up (RURL Proofed). In some ways, after reading that write-up, I feel like the movie did not such a bad job of capturing the original intent of Mr. Lee and Mr. Kirby.