Can this ship be saved?

I'll elaborate more later, but time is short at the moment. I had an impromptu parent-teacher conference with Darby's teacher today. Basically ALL of Darby's recent tallies have been for not doing her work. And there was a book report due 18 Feb that she never told me about. I had her complete her book report due 21 March before it was even March, so we would have had the Feb report done long ago if she had said one word about it. There is so much more to say about this. Tune in later for the rest.

Ten dollar dilemma

I found a ten dollar bill in my yard this morning. It was on my property, but I'm reasonably certain it is not mine. As silly as it may seem, I don't feel morally proper taking ownership of the funds to spend as I wish. But I have no way of determining who it belongs to, nor do I have the time to do a neighbor to neighbor inquisition to determine if it is one of theirs. Were it a significantly larger amount, I would take it to the police and let them handle it. However, I feel if I were to do that now, they would scoff. And then they would absorb that ten dollars to cover the man-hour cost it took them to scoff. No disrespect to the hard working men and women in blue.

My current top consideration is to give it to church. My children's Sunday school classes are presently collecting for Catholic Relief Services, and I'm thinking I'm going to exchange the ten for two fives and put a five in each of their boxes. Or maybe I'll covert it to coins so their boxes will fill up faster. That seems like a more honorable thing to do.

Not that I couldn't use the ten dollars. It's just, not my ten dollars to use.

How deep does the rabbit hole go?

As previously posted, Darby is grounded for the weekend (actually through Monday per her mother). So when we were at my dad's this evening, she was not permitted to go to the other room to watch cartoons with her sister. Her options were to read, study spelling words, or work on word puzzles.

Well, at some point during the evening, Darby spilled a full cup of juice on the kitchen floor. Not a terrible scenario typically, everybody huffs and puffs, cleans up the mess, and we go about our evening. But in this case, Darby decided not to tell anyone. We went about our evening sure enough, but none the wiser to the sizable mess in the kitchen under the table.

As we were gathering our belongs to go home, I checked the kitchen to see if the girls left anything there. I noticed a cup on the table was sitting in a small pool of liquid. Strange. With further inspection, I saw that there was a much more vast pool of liquid under the table. Well, that was just great, of course.

So I summoned Darby to the kitchen and asked, "what's this?" pointing to the cup on the table. She responded, apparently not thinking that I had already examined the floor, "oh, I spilled my drink a little."

Imagine a mass invocation of ire about that time.

So I pushed the table out of the way, led her by the hand to the puddle on the floor, and expressed my astonishment at her description of the incident. There were many questions. I raised my voice. "How is this a little?" "Why didn't you tell anyone?" "Were you even going to tell anyone?" "Ever?" "Did you think this would disappear and go unnoticed?" "Why didn't you at least try to clean it up?" "Were we going to get all the way home before I got a call from grandpa asking what the heck this mess on the floor is from?"

She shrugged her shoulders in that disrespectfully ignorant way. Upon further grilling I got the, "I didn't say anything because I knew you would act this way," in that 9-going-on-13-attitude tone.

In the span of the next 1.5 seconds, I had turned her around, swatted her butt, grabbed the paper towels, put them in her hand, and instructed her to clean up her mess immediately, and then to apologize to her grandfather.

You see, I happened to know that my father spent a half-hour that morning sweeping and mopping the kitchen floor. That she would nullify the effort in such a way, as though the world were unquestionably her trash can, got the best of me.

After closely supervising the cleanup, I sat her down for a talk. I explained what had already been explained several times in recent weeks. That honesty about the matter up front is always the right and less painful thing to do. I explained that had she told someone at the onset of the incident, we would have complained and fussed about it like anyone would, but she would not have been scolded, definitely not attitude adjusted (i.e. swatted), and her grounding wouldn't be getting an extension. I expressed my frustration with the silliness of it all. That it all happened over a cup of spilled juice.

But I also gave her a hug, told her I loved her, apologized for the harshness, and explained that the extension of her grounding would be short lived if she could show improvement at school in the next couple days.

I know I'm being a little ridiculous. But this is a compounded solution for a compounding problem. I need a life-Tivo. You know, that would record only good parts, and let me skip all the mess. And don't get me started on the pausing live TV features.

Why didn't I think of that?

The girls and I were at the mall this evening looking around at first communion dress options for Darby (though she previously pointed out a dress she likes, we're exploring the non-three-figure options a little). We stopped in the food court to grab a bite, and within minutes of us sitting down, there was a commotion behind us. I turned around, and a family had pulled a bunch of the tables together, put a large table cloth on the (collective) table, and shortly thereafter there were more than a dozen kids sitting at the table. Soon to follow was a cake (of the birthday variety), a bunch of presents, and family members roaming around with camcorders and digital cameras.

Now, this was Saturday night in a trendy mall food court, somewhere around 7pm, so it was already crowded and hectic. And all of the sudden, there is a full-blown birthday party going right behind us, with kids running around screaming (I estimate the average kid age at 7), presents being opened, wrapping paper everywhere, flashes going off, happy birthday being sung. Combine this with ambient weekend mall food court ruckus, and you'll begin to imagine the mayhem we found ourselves in.

The marvel is that this seemingly spontaneous party began, occurred, concluded, and vanished in less time than it took the kids and I too receive and eat our food. When we were getting rid of our trash, they were long gone.

At first, I was perplexed by this phenomenon. But then I realized that family was on to something. They benefited from the best of both birthday worlds. All parents know that you basically have two birthday options for your kids... have it at home, or have it not at home. The home option is cheaper, but there's still all the setup and cleanup, which is a big pain. The non-home option, while usually lower maintenance from the setup/cleanup perspective, is unfortunately much more costly. Typically on the order of $75-150. But this food court birthday family got off easy. Not only did they not have it at home (avoiding the setup/cleanup), but by having it at the food court (in a clearly non-mall-coordinated fashion), it was essentially a free ride. Holy cow!

I'm not saying you'll see the girls and I and many of their friends at your local mall eatery celebrating a birthday any time soon, but I am in deep parental admiration of the ingenuity of that family (mostly in how slickly they pulled it off in very adverse conditions). Sometimes I think I'm a little bit smart. But on nights like this, I see that I've clearly got a thing or two to learn.

Grounding revisited

Darby's mother called me a short while ago. Apparently Darby's stint of good behavior and improved classwork scores has come to an end. She had a note from her teacher yesterday stating that she has 7 tallies this week and hasn't been finishing her work. Funny, I ask her everyday if she's gotten any tallies, or if she finished her work, and she of late has responded only in the affirmative (or negative with regard to tallies). Her mother has instituted a weekend grounding for her dishonesty. Instead of being honest with her mother, she tried to hide the fact that she got tallies at all, and then still never directly admitted it, giving only the attitude-ridden response of "there's a note in my assignment pad". Even this admission came only today, upon much prompting, instead of yesterday, when the note was actually issued. She would have tried to sneak it by is had she not been challenged. The exact kind of thing that truly chides a parent. In case you non-parents were wondering where in this short tale the big deal could be found.

So much for that birthday party we were going to attend tomorrow. Laser tag would have been oh so fun. I'm slightly inclined to attend the party by myself, play a little laser tag, and brag endlessly to my troubled daughter about just how excellent a party Ms. Gasser can throw for her son. But I'm sure such a tactic would only raise the stakes in our clashes of attitude. The higher-stakes game will be bad enough when she's a teenager. Nine is not the age to be fanning such flames.

Ouch

I guess I should be offended. I am, afterall, one of THEM.


via Slashdot:
"American Library Association president Michael Gorman is not too fond of bloggers and blogging. '[The] Blog People (or their subclass who are interested in computers and the glorification of information) have a fanatical belief in the transforming power of digitization and a consequent horror of, and contempt for, heretics who do not share that belief... Given the quality of the writing in the blogs I have seen, I doubt that many of the Blog People are in the habit of sustained reading of complex texts. It is entirely possible that their intellectual needs are met by an accumulation of random facts and paragraphs.'"


I feel rather intellectually satisfied by referencing his random paragraph. I'm not sure about his facts, though. And I would call his article a blog entry (not by his definition of course) if I didn't know better. For you complex text readers, see the full article.

Freakin Depreciation

After months of back-and-forth, I received my first (and hopefully not last) insurance reimbursement check post-burglary. After deductables, maximums, and depreciation (the biggest factor), I get 63% of the amount I expected to get. I've only replaced two items out of pocket since this all started, and I planned to replace many things later on, but I almost can't replace some things now given what I've got left (once I pay off the credit card for the two replacement items). I almost feel like I've been robbed again.

Don't you hate it when thunderstorm instigated flashy clocks throw off your morning?

Me too.

I was right to loathe this morning. It was complicated by a bout with the allergies. And then by needing to rush to Shelby's fencing so that I could get the kids fed as Darby had a make-up piano lesson on the opposite side of town right after Shelby's fencing. It was after 8:30 when we got home, but fortunately Darby did homework while Shelby was fencing and Shelby did homework while Darby was pianoing. We still made it to bed by 9:20. It all sucked, but it certainly could have been worse.

Yeah for Federal Holidays

After a slight sleep-in, I took the girls to the movies. We saw that Winn Dixie movie, which was okay, but not one of the better kid movies out there. I found myself wanting to leave at several points. After the movies, we grabbed lunch, and I took the girls to the park. It was a nice day and we hadn't visited the park in some time.

Overall it was a fairly relaxing day off, and I really dig long weekends, but I also hate Tuesday-Mondays. I dread many things about tomorrow.

The questions of innocence

Shelby:
"Daddy, how does the clicky thing know which way you're turning?"

What was I thinking?

Note to self... when health is on the rocks, wear a heavy jacket on cold days. 31 (with wind chill) is not good light-jacket weather.


Apparently I wasn't thinking straight this morning. I went and left the house with the wrong class of jacket. Just because it was a jacket-less 70+ two days ago doesn't mean I can go around being all weather-ignorant. Definitely not good for "the system".

The health was marginally better today. Didn't go to the doctor, but maybe should have. No fever, but a stuffy nose lingers. There was at least one piece of good news on the day.

Please make it stop

It was a third day in a row of fevers and headaches. But it got worse in that I hadn't previously been coughing or sniffling. Well, around three, my nose started running like a waterfall, and in just a few hours, my nose was sushi raw from all the wiping and blowing. If this keeps up tomorrow I guess I'm going to have to make a doctor's appointment.

In spite of my misery, I did take my two little valentines to a nice dinner. The girls are now in bed, and I, too, am going to crash now.

The morning's pseudo-normalcy was replaced by a second straight fever-ridden afternoon (100.4 today vs 101.3 yesterday). It's good we took it easy today.

Parenting under duress

I started to have that tingling feeling of illness in the back of my throat Friday night. When I got home, I crashed out, and I didn't get up until after 1pm Saturday afternoon. I was freezing, sore all over, and had my most monstrous headache in recent history. When it came time to go get the kids from their mom's, everything was slow going, but I did eventually get there.

I had plans for the kids since we didn't do anything last weekend due to Darby's grounding, but I could tell it was going to be trying. It had started to rain, which required more concentration on the road, which aggravated the headache. When we finally got to the movie theater, we had about thirty minutes to spare. I had planned to take them to see the new Pooh movie, but while we were in line they were reading the movies that were playing and started jumping up and down... "Let's see 'Are We There Yet?', Let's see 'Are We There Yet?'". Not being in the mood for conflict, I gave in, and we bought tickets for the next showing. Trouble was, it was more than an hour until that show. Ugh.

So we strolled over to the Marble Slab Creamery where the kids got ice cream after I was frustrated by being skipped in the line twice by the behind the counter help. Then, when I was helped -- only because we were the last three standing there -- I got the question "is this all together?" to which I responded, "well, yes, these ARE my children." I guess they didn't see the resemblance. :)

It took the kids about twenty minutes to finish their ice cream, while I just tried to ignore my headache and increasingly sore lower back. We went ahead and headed back to the theater and sat there for thirty or so minutes waiting for it to start. The movie ended up being about five minutes longer than expected because there was a power outage and it took them a few minutes to get things going again.

By the time we got out of the theater, I felt like I was going to keel over. I was going to take the kids to Nothing but Noodles for dinner because they love that place and it was right by the theater. But I knew I would not be able to eat, and I wasn't so sure about the kids since they were eating when I picked them up from their mom's, then they had ice cream, and then popcorn.

We ended up going to Sonic so I could relieve my back pain by laying down with the seat back while we waited for our order. After Sonic, we were heading home, but I made a last minute decision to go to my dad's. As soon as we got there, I sent the kids to watch TV and I crashed on my dad's couch. I slept there for about three hours before the kids and I went home. All of us went right to be when we got home, and we didn't get up until about ten this morning. I definitely feel better, but I'm not 100%. The shame of it is that it's already such a nice day. It's 63 degrees and excellent outdoor weather, perfect for park going or bike riding. But I'm still pretty slow moving and don't think it's a good idea to press it in that way.

Repealed

Something I didn't mention on Tuesday was that Darby's grounding was extended through the weekend, rather than being concluded on Friday (today). While at her sister's fencing lesson, she was supposed to study spelling after doing her homework, but her mother caught her playing jump rope instead, which was a direct violation of the terms of her grounding, and resulted in the extension.

However, in light of her progress in the last 30 or so hours, her mother and I have reconsidered. Her mother reports that Darby cleaned her room up very well last night, and has behaved, and then there was the test scores and positive note from the teacher today (see yesterday's updated entry).

So, barring futher transgression, the extension of her original week-long grounding has been repealed, and she is now a normal kid again. However, she has been so advised that we must keep up the pace on studying so that we can turn those three Cs around in time for report cards.

Can you Place the State? I've always felt my US geography knowledge was decent... while this is pretty easy, at least I wasn't flat wrong.

It just keeps getting better

Less than a week after Darby's brush with delinquency, she gets six tallies in a single day. She has been put on warning by the school. Any more tallies this week and they will swat her. Now, she's had her share over tallies of the years, but never this many in one day.

As if that weren't enough, she brings home a progress report with 3 Cs, her first Cs on a progress report or report card ever. All of her other grades are on the decline as well. In fact, I think there were only two As. Even though her grounding is almost up, it looks like she's going to get a lot less goof-time while we try to get her grades up by the next report card.


UPDATE, 11 FEB
Darby had a much better day today. There was a note from her teacher in her school bag that said she was perfect today. Also, she got As on two tests, both in subjects that were Cs on her progress report.

We all fall down

Well, it is Ash Wednesday. I know, the girls didn't think it was funny either. After mass I asked if they were going to fall down and that just went nowhere. It really wasn't worth mentioning, but I've gone and done it anyway.

Funny, I don't feel fat

So I guess I failed today's objective. I'm not even at my "52-week high". I've been hovering around 145 of late, a bit off my holiday high of ~152.

Flashbacks

Geez. From the "I thought those guys were dead" department...

I just watched Night Ranger perform Sister Christian Unplugged on the Late Late Show. They were my favorite band back in the late middle school to early high school timeframe. I had all of their albums (on tape) and even had their buttons on my jean jacket.

And then there was that time on a band trip (insert gratuitous American Pie reference here) to Florida when Night Ranger was playing at Sea World, and I was there... only for very silly reasons I didn't get to see them. I only heard them from a far.

Oh, the 80's memories...

Because I did so well at getting rid of them before...

I still had a few Gmail invites as of yesterday, as the interest in them has seriously declined. Well, Google has decided to up the ante big time, giving members 50 (!) invites, which means I'll pretty much NEVER get rid of them. Considering I have created multiple accounts for myself for various uses, I've now literally got hundreds of invites to dispose of. Anyone want 'em?


Anyone?

At least it was close

Could have been worse. It could have been a blow-out (especially with the mistakes they were making). Now next year, they MUST go all the way.


UPDATE
It's been mentioned that I didn't comment more directly on the game. All I will say is that the apparent lack of clock management skills is the cause of my recent hair loss.

Been caught stealin'

No, I'm not referring to our burglaries of a few months ago. Or the criminals that were caught.

In an ironic twist, my own daughter was caught stealing today. It's ironic because the cash from her piggy bank as stolen in the burglaries, and she was pretty devastated by that fact.

So what did she steal? What was so important that she risked her young honor and good standing?

Beef jerky.

The girl wanted some beef jerky that didn't belong to her and she took it. She took it and got caught red handed by a teacher. In another twist of irony, if she had just waited thirty minutes she could have gotten some from her mother by just asking. That crazy kid.

Instead, she has been scalded scolded, lectured to, and severely grounded for a week. She is also writing letters of apology to a couple of teachers and the student who's jerky she took.

I very much wanted to spank her for her actions -- I consider this a spankable offense -- but I did not. However, she is on probation and will absolutely receive a spanking if she violates the terms of her grounding during the next week.


So which kid was it?

You're thinking Shelby aren't you? Well, those of you who know my kids are anyway.


But you'd be wrong. It was Darby. Can you believe it? In a way I could, but it's still immensely distressing.

Shelby's a three-striper (that's one P folks, not two)

Shelby passed her fencing test today, so she is now a three-stripe apprentice, which is the top level apprentice. When she passes her next test, she'll be a musketeer. Passing her test meant being able to perform the "disengage" maneuver, to go along with her previously mastered skills of advance, retreat, parry, and riposte. If all this seems confusing to you, you can check out a fencing glossary.